dimanche

isolate the wound

i'm a fetishizer, i'm obsessed
i'm a fetishizer, i'm obsessed
i'm a fetishizer, i'm obsessed
i'm obsessed
i'm obsessed
i'm obsessed
i love animals
i love life
i came upon life
with human love
they made me eat meat
they made me carnivorous
they taught me sex
they taught me stress
i love certain things
in certain situations
i love seeing you
under certain angles
i want to eat you
i want to eat you
i want to eat
you
i'm a fetishizer, i'm obsessed
i'm a fetishizer, i'm obsessed
i'm a fetishizer, i'm obsessed
i'm obsessed
i'm obsessed
i'm obsessed
i'm no masochist
i'm no catholic
but i'm obsessed
and i'll protect you from me
i won't be the problem
but a recluse symptom

i'm afraid of death, afraid of anything changing and having to move on from each thing i've grown attached to, i love everything

when crossing a street is a disaster
(what have i become?)
when crossing a line provokes an outcry
(what more did they stole?)

nobody wants their life to just stop
and even less for yours to just fall
but in the end every thing hangs up call
is that survival
to never pick up the phone

there's no better ways to deal
(a coke and a pack of cigarettes)
we should see ourselves as last meal
(finish it up, order refill)

chance is to end up elsewhere
than wherever you're lying flat
danger's to miss the right stop
but there's always
a left hop, to hop to
the next stop, for hope to
leave hope too

felt like shit at 5am

went with mom and dad to an afternoon party
dad got us drunk all day with beers
we went back home at six
smoked a joint at nine chilling on the web
i was d e s t r o y e d
ended blacking out with "gerudo town (night)" music
in headphones over my spliff and beer
then i woke up at 3am
everything went batshit
stressed over unanswered mails
stressed over past crushes
can't go back to sleep and
feel like being weird
feel like brushing my teeth but
feel like smoking again
feel bad over basic behaviour
when i shouldn't? when life is what it is
in the comfort of my bed
here is my weakness
it's a gold plated luxury
i fear my dreams
aren't even worth aiming, for
do i even fight? do i even work for these goals?
where am i, i know this
whereas eye eygoddis

jeudi

sans titre (03/17)

sur la route pour rentrer chez moi
l'optique de bader dans les bras
de celle que tu n'es pas. flammes ouvertes
sur la côte ouest d'où ils ont pu
fabuler

fabuleuse
l'image que j'ai de toi
les pires insultes, et le dédain crasse 
que mes privilèges portent en défense
je te dédie une haine bête synonyme de peur
et de faiblesse mentale, sociale
dominante, fatigante

non ce n'est pas de l'amour,
non ce n'est pas de l'amour
et du soir au matin tu le sais
je ne suis ni seul ni triste
juste aigri et jaloux
éloigne de moi tes joues

mais, mais j'apprendrai pour toi,
non, non j'apprendrai pour moi
ce ne sont plus les défauts que je vois
juste toi en défaut de moi
juste moi en défaut tout court-bien trop court
bien trop court

je le penserai quand je te dirai merci
je le pense quand je le dis

merci de ne pas avoir dis oui
je suis mieux dans la vie, la vie
que je dois vivre
pour toi et pour tous les autres
pour vous autres
comme vous le faites pour moi


merci de vivre pour moi.

manques

non, tu ne me manques pas
même si je pense à toi, parfois
non, tu ne me manques pas
même si c'est bien de toi
que je parle, là
faible c'est bien de toi
que je me cache, là
c'est si simple de ne pas réagir
c'est si simple de ne pas répondre
lorsque c'est ton siège,
que l'on frappe sans cesse
y'a-t'il vraiment à perdre
lorsqu'on n'y gagne rien
un jour tu m'enverras un signe
vous m'avez tous et toutes,
envoyé des signes
mais qui pensez-vous tromper?
et non ça ne pardonne jamais
jamais il n'y a à pardonner
quand personne n'a jamais, fauté
il n'y a qu'un pas à, sauter
donc non, tu ne me manques pas
car vous êtes toutes et tous, là en moi
les corps étrangers s'en vont en coulant
reste un fluide gazeux ou luminescent
l'âme de la fabrique, le fantôme de la coquille
que demander de plus?
me demander de plus?
on ne me demande rien
je dors dans un bus

non, tu ne me manques pas

dimanche

Power Abuses

Never forget, never forgive the abuses
Never get over it or avoid
The cost of pain and the damages you caused
Because your hands weren't tied
And empathy faults your pride
Is it hard not to hide, or is it worst
To be oppressed at rest?
Winner's always a loser
And losing is a luxury for the boy'd
Punishment, there is no fruition
Repent repel the cushion
It's too late to make conditions
Evinced and pierced like a boil
Lamenting cows, coil...

samedi

nightlife love in the lose

just spent two weeks on a single game
wasting life on internet
my feet are swollen from the heat
and from not using them to walk
or something
it's been like early summer
or sumthin
and since the days have started to look good
i shut myself in and escaped reality
for another glorious one
where my feet lead me across five continents
where i never sleep, and northern lights drive me
to a world so different

it feels good to be alive when
you're a zombie
and you lose touch with it
what you are, where your fingers
on the controllers are
i do care, you know i care
maybe i just care too much
it's a tree or it's a rock but it's projected
in 3D in the life you pretend to avoid
that makes you go oï

feet hurt my feet hurt my feet hurt my feet hurt my feet hurt and i'm descending
it's rigged it's all rigged we're all rigged but god it's so much better than anything
god's so worth it when you don't need to get it together for better than anything